Per the GRANT
command, there is no ability to set permission-levels on a per-row basis (table/columns, yes - but not the individual rows).
You could setup a View to handle this though and grant the user permission to access the view instead.
A view such as the following should give you the messages based on the current user:
CREATE VIEW user_messages AS
SELECT *
FROM messages
WHERE
messages.from = user() OR messages.to = user();
And the grant-statement should be similar:
GRANT ALL ON db.user_messages TO 'jeffrey'@'localhost';
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